Bad Baby Names

My boss David suggested that I get all the bad baby names out of my system now, so I don't name my kid a bad name when it counts. So I thought I would compile a list of names that would not work at all.

Utah and Idaho Style
Skaught (pronounced Scott)
McKyndraly
Diezle (it sounds way manly but looks way girly)
KneeFy (Nephi--bad spelling and from the Book of Mormon)


Family Names(ish)
AnnDrew (for a girl, named after Dad)
Glennda (named for Andrew's dad, Glenn)
Leslie (for a boy, my sister's name is Leslie)
Ingeborg (love Andrew's Oma, but the part with "borg" in it would not go well with my trekkie family)


Names with an Esset (ß)--as Fassmann is traditionally spelled Faßmann
Caßidy (Cassidy)
Jeßee (Jessee)
Rußel (Russel)
Shariße (Sharisse)
Aniße (Anisse)
Katniß (Katniss--no I have not read or seen Hunger Games)


Good German Names
Fritz (and for a girl--Fritzine)
Heinz (but what about Dr.Doofenshmirtz?)
Käse (cheese in German...it could be cute)
Astrid (Astird... ha ha)
Hildegard (poor kid)



Names From Sports (suggested by my friend Greg) (bad because neither of us are athletic)
Mesut (for Mesut Özil, a soccer player for Germany and Real Madrid)
Tiger (for Tiger Woods)
Mia (for soccer player Mia Hamm)
Serena (for tennis player Serena Williams)
Arnold (for Arnold Palmer, a golfer and the namesake of my boss's favorite drink, whom I would always think of)


Just Bad Names
Spacealien (pronounced spas-e-a-leen)
Jesus (Spanish pronunciation, but let's be real  here. The kid is going to be super white.)
Willard Harrison Quentin (named for my current work, the Western Historical Quarterly, or the WHQ)
Midge (our kid is going to be short. It's a fact of life. She doesn't need to open it up to being called midget)


There are other bad names out there. I just thought I would share a few of the bad ones so you can enjoy. Being named any of these names would surely traumatize the Baby Platypus for life.